Hello EB readers,  I am starting off a new series tagged “RELATIONSHIP TUESDAY” wherein discussions , topics concerning relationships would be addressed. A new topic would be discussed by me every Tuesday and you are very free ad welcome to drop in your comments and air your views. You can also drop in suggestions for topics you want to be talked on.

Today , we would be discussing the “WRONG PARTNER

Imago Therapy

These days people fall in and out of love with the wrong person .Do you often wonder if you picked the wrong partner? You were SO in love, and now you just can’t get what you need from them.

People often ask the question especially the ladies- ‘’ why do the wrong people get attracted so much to me,the way insects cling to sugar?…’’ ..or why am I always so unlucky with relationships?

Being in a relationship with the wrong person is time wasting , energy exhausting and emotionally draining because only one person puts his / her heart , time , and energy. it is not mutual. it is like embarking on a never-ending journey .
The wrong partner :

  • will cheat on you,
  • lie to You,
  • use You,
  • he/she hardly calls,texts…you do all the calling all the time,
  • He/she can’t boldly introduce to his/her friends or relatives.
  • He is abusive,physically,verbally, emotionally ..even s*xually.
  • He/she treats you like ‘’ trash’’ publicly.

Sometimes ,you often wonder what you are still doing in such a relationship,you really want to come out of it,but you don’t know how to come out of it but It takes a determined mind to come out of that trap you are in .

The question i ask myself most times is – why do people often stay in these kind of relationship? why do they keep on bearing this pain all in the name of “LOVE” ? The answer is that most individuals can’t just stand being alone,or they can’t boldly say ‘’ I am still single,am not in a relationship’’. You just can’t say NO to the advances from a guy or lady. Some feel being single is a disease .
It is because of this ‘’hunger’ or ‘’rush’ for a partner that makes people to grab anybody that wants to date them even if there is a “WRONG PERSON” tag on his/her head .You always want to brag in the midst of your friends that am dating Mr S,Miss K…even when you know the relationship is going nowhere, IF YOU LIE TO THE WHOLE WORLD,MUST YOU LIE TO YOURSELF!!!!!!!

So many people find themselves in this situation because they look for the wrong qualities in a partner,so many people place so much priorities on Material things like – good looks, power , cash loaded etc. I am not saying all these are bad factors but they should not take the position of important priorities when it comes to your relationships . They can be the perfect side attractions though. There is more to a person that than blue eyes,pink lips,cute smile,working in a big company,having a fleet of car etc.
The most important quality to look out for in a partner is –Personality. Personality encompasses a lot of what makes a person.Everyone will grow old physically,but a great personality will remain unchanged with age.

Remember to chose a partner not only with your eyes but with your intelligence. Pick someone who makes sense for who you are today. That is the key.

In addition,some people continue dating the wrong person thinking they can change the person. Hmm , if you are someone with this mentality you are wasting your time . No man has the ability to change another person ,only God can work in a man’s life,heart and completely change the person.Though ,God can use a man,but you can take a horse to the stream,but you can’t force it to drink water.So many people have wasted several years in a fruitless relationship thinking they can change their partners. So if you know there are some qualities in your partner you cant stand and this your partner doesn’t want to improve then please move on o!!!

Moreover,I believe the root of this problem is simply ‘’ lack of self love’’. IF you love yourself,know your worth and know that you deserve better , You wouldn’t date or continue dating someone that tosses you around and treats you anyhow like crap . Love makes the world go round, but it all begins with you. If you want others to treat you well, treat yourself well first. If you seek love from another, fall in love with yourself first.

Image: Chimp husband and human wife looking disappointed in bed

The truth is that as long as we live, before you meet that ‘special one’,you will always get advances or meet the wrong person.I feel we should try to reach a level of maturity such that we choose who we give our hearts to or fall in love with,stop using your hearts for experiments.By doing so,we will save ourselves a lot of heart breaks and headache.
It’s beautiful and good to fall or be in love,but it’s best to fall or be in love with the “right person”.

Readers, what do you think?.Share your opinions in your comments below.Let’s discuss!!!!!!!!!

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